MRI update

Sorry for not posting Monday or yesterday, but the bad news continues, and I am just doing my best right now. I saw Dr. Nick on Monday morning. The brain tumor has advanced. He said it happens to maybe one in four patients who undergo the radiation/oral chemo. Somehow, don't ask me how, I just knew the news was not going to be good. Basically, Dr. Nick said I have three options: 1) Pursue clinical studies 2) Undergo an IV chemo treatment 3) Let the disease take it's course. Of course, he also suggested I get another opinion, which we are pursuing at this time. I already have an appointment with a doctor in Jacksonville on election day. So, the process moves on.

Thanks to all of you for your unending words of love and support. I have received gifts and notes from countless people. I cherish all of them. Somehow without you holding me in your arms this would be much harder.

All my love,
Ellen

Yes, it has been way too long since I posted. My dear friend, Donna, has finally accomplished the task of getting me to write to you. Since my radiation ended two weeks ago, physically and mentally it has been hard to function. Of course, I always think if I cannot write something positive, then I should not write at all. Everyone who reads and posts on this blog are very special to me. Some, I have never met, yet they write such endearing thoughts of encouragement. If for one day, I can take one thing that was written and focus on it, I can make it until the next day. That's what I have been doing. And sometimes, it is very difficult because you don't know how many days are left. Cathy and I talked about that today. At the beginning of this illness, I thought that by knowing I wasn't going to live until 90, would somehow get me prepared to die. That has not happened yet. Today, I saw a therapist whom I immediately liked and connected with. In a one hour she helped me to realize that I cannot possibly have all the answers now. It seems so simple doesn't it? It is not easy, but knowing that all my friends and family support me is a great comfort.
With love to All,
Ellen

Update

"At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us." —Albert Schweitzer

Ellen is going to need our sparks for the next couple of days! On Thursday, October 16th (at 9:00 a.m.) she has a follow-up MRI to see the results of the first round of radiation and chemotherapy. Then on Monday, October 20th (again at 9:00 a.m.) she meets with Dr. Nicholas Avgeropoulos (Dr. Nick) for the results. This is a very trying time for both Ellen, Cathy, their families and for all of us (their extended family). We are all with you Ellen, and will be sending our light your way. Thanks for letting us be with you on your journey!

The past two weeks have seemed endless, and then again, I never seem to get the things done that I deem important. This blog has been a great inspiration, and a task that seems too hard. I do appreciate all that have posted warm and loving messages. I have four radiation treatments left. Then, I'll have a couple of weeks for my body to recover, and my brain synapses to reconnect. Thanks, thanks, and more thanks, to all who have posted messages, and supported me. Thanks to all of you who sent well wishes, gifts, and messages of support. You have all helped more than you will ever know.
With love,
Ellen

Kansas City

Cathy showed and sold her work at the Plaza Art Fair in Kansas City this past weekend. The show was full of love, hugs and tears for both Ellen and Cathy. Ellen you were very missed by all your friends. Betsy and Sally (bottom photo) have a glass of Boulevard beer waiting for you and expect to see you next year on the Plaza!

Feelings are so difficult to express. Those of you that really know me, know that my feelings are creatures that I covet in some small cave deep within. I am always so touched when you respond to something I have written. It really does make my day a little bit better. I'm working on this new life given to me, and yes at times it is challenging, but I'm also learning a great deal about me and the people that love me. When times are trying, I look back at the blog and realize that so many people really do care. Thanks so much for being a part of this journey.
Love,
Ellen

Good Morning,
It is Monday, and just a gorgeous day in Flordia. Of course it's hot as Hades, but that's to be expected here in September. I had a great weekend. We went to the Morse Art Museum in Winter Park. It is simply gorgeous, and so well assembled. It contains the most work of Tiffany anywhere in the world. The amount of glass, pottery, jewelry, and the spectacular Chicago World's Fair Altar are all on display. I was so moved and impressed. It's so nice to experience that kind of beauty and appreciate the artistry. And it is just minutes away!

I keep finding big or little things that make me happy. It keeps me going. They touch my heart, and for just a moment I'm
experience a great peace of just being.

Love to All (especially Saints fans),
Ellen