Yes, it has been way too long since I posted. My dear friend, Donna, has finally accomplished the task of getting me to write to you. Since my radiation ended two weeks ago, physically and mentally it has been hard to function. Of course, I always think if I cannot write something positive, then I should not write at all. Everyone who reads and posts on this blog are very special to me. Some, I have never met, yet they write such endearing thoughts of encouragement. If for one day, I can take one thing that was written and focus on it, I can make it until the next day. That's what I have been doing. And sometimes, it is very difficult because you don't know how many days are left. Cathy and I talked about that today. At the beginning of this illness, I thought that by knowing I wasn't going to live until 90, would somehow get me prepared to die. That has not happened yet. Today, I saw a therapist whom I immediately liked and connected with. In a one hour she helped me to realize that I cannot possibly have all the answers now. It seems so simple doesn't it? It is not easy, but knowing that all my friends and family support me is a great comfort.
With love to All,
Ellen